Miyerkules, Setyembre 12, 2012

Second Chances

Someone once said that you should fall in love only when you’re ready, never when you’re lonely. Somehow I forgot that advice and fell in love with a lonely man who I thought was my second chance at love.

I laid down my heart and felt the love, but I was a fool, because I was the only one who felt it. By the time I realized it was over, I was dead inside and my world fell apart. 

The days became endless struggles to survive and forget, but the nights betrayed me, and the tears didn’t stop.

Yes, I healed, but it took time to recover and gather the pieces of what remained of my heart. When finally I was strong again, healed, and happy being single, I promised myself that never again will I let myself be hurt by a lonely man masquerading to be prince charming.

Who needs the prince charming that turns into an ugly frog at the slight twist of surprise?
Or maybe he was really an ugly frog from the beginning and I was just too blind to see. That was yesterday, something that I’ve already left behind.

And I know now, he really wasn’t my second chance, but a way for me to get to know what second chances really mean and why I deserve to have it.

The future is my imperfect man, who is ready for me, and will love me as much as I love him, and will make my world maybe not as perfect but happily complete.

And this will be my celebration for the real second chance. (Mei Magsino)

Making Connections


Every person we meet is a lesson in life, and every encounter, a chance to connect and an adventure to get to.
While some people scoff at the idea of being friendly to everybody, putting up a bright smile for the world to see, most of us get a load of positivity whenever we see smiles from strangers and even from those we don't know.  It's as if the smile is our connection to them, telling us that's it's  a good day to make things right.  With the right attitude.
We’ve always believed and we still do, that people like people who are friendly.  If you show an interested in him, he’ll be interested in you too.
Show an interest in others, and every encounter becomes an adventure.  As a writer, I've known for so long that in this industry,  making connections and building friendships are the bonuses we get from doing the job we love to do.
One night I was with writer friends, my crew in a cafe, when an australian guy in the next table who were looking at us, looked directly at me, and I smiled. It took just that to start a converstaion and he transfered to our table.
Turned out he's alone, lonely, and misses his family in Australia. He then started to tell us his story, his adventures, and his work in a cement  manufacturing  company that takes him to different parts of the world.  And he turned out to be a diver too, an environmentalist, who like us, love nature and do everything we can to protect it.
We listened to him, and understood him. Somehow the sadness he felt was lessened and the mood changed from lonely, to light, to happy.  Sometimes it only takes people to have someone to talk to and make a lot of difference.
We made a connection!  After a couple of drinks, we transferred to a fine-dining restaurant that he’s been to, where Australian steaks were served.  And here again, he felt home.  He even agreed to continue the story telling over rounds of beer and brandy in the terrace of our house till the wee hours of the evening.
It was amazing how he threw out all his cautions in the air to be with us, strangers at first, but surely his future “crazy crowd.”  Some people are born with a good instinct to choose the good crowd to connect with.
By the time we decided to call it a night, it was already dawn.  We took him back to his hotel, knowing we might never see him again, but that’s alright, we have his email address and we will meet again for another adventure.  He lives half a world away, and we were just half his size, but we’ve made a friend in him, and connected.
For us, that was quite an adventure that we would treasure.  For a total stranger, a foreigner to put his full trust on us, whom he just met in a cafe, was really a lesson on making a connection.
How often do we allow such opportunities to pass us by.  The American who everyone thinks was sore and lonely,  or the boy with the odd clothes sitting alone in the corner of the cafe, or the girl who was staring at the wall—those people have a story to tell as surely as you do.  And like you, they dream that someone is willing to hear them.
Sometimes, we just let the opportunities to meet people and connect pass us by because we fear that they will judge us, not knowing that they too, are worrying how we may judge them.
But the truth is, if you just smile and show them you’re interested to meet them, they’ll be interested in you too.  And the connection begins.
Like people first, ask the questions later.  And listen to their stories. Who knows? Maybe it's a story for the asking.  They'll feel relieved, and you'll feel good, knowing that in your simplest self, you found a new friend and helped him too.
It's so simple. Just smile. See if the light you shine on others isn’t reflected in you a hundredfold.  (Mei Magsino)